The Dawkter's Wife - It's all champagne and caviar now … dahling

Surviving Cancer,The Loony Bin

May 29, 2010

Sliding into home…

It was 95F this week. My grape plants are showing early signs of a Fall harvest. I added a new part to my vineyard (and nearly lost my thumb yesterday hammering in the stakes with my 5 pound hammer!) The tomatoes, onions, peppers and brussel sprouts are in. I have spent countless hours outside laying down industrial grade weed guard and staking it into the ground. I’m tired of fighting with the natural growth by the pond. I have left enough space to still allow it to grow along the shore, but after 3 years of fighting its creep into my garden and our yard I decided to set some boundaries! LOL Pictures to follow eventually!

Summer is almost here.

It has had its graceful and less graceful moments. Tuesday was one of those OMG moments. Aidan’s Kindergarten graduation and Andrew’s last baseball game and picnic were at about the same time. My attempt to do both fell flat, and with Thomas working I was wrestling the end of the year beast all by myself. We ended up being 15 minutes late to Aidan’s 30 minute graduation ceremony. I was beside myself. When one of the teachers called me on my cell to ask if we were actually coming, I snapped “we don’t all have teacher’s hours. My husband is still at work at 5:30. I’m doing the best I can!”. We stayed for 10 minutes (missing the potluck) and made it back across town to Andrew, who was waiting by himself alone in St. Joe at the baseball field after the game. We decided to just blow off the end-of the-year baseball picnic because I was so upset that Aidan really missed out on his graduation. Instead of the picnic, we let Aidan choose where he wanted to eat: Space Aliens. I was crabby until Thomas hit the jackpot and the machine backfired and gave us 3800 tickets. Aidan picked out so many prizes and was thrilled. I felt like the universe finally was giving back! LOL!

Wednesday I had an appointment with a new primary care provider…the same one that I saw in the hospital. I have been symptomatic with my right lung for almost a month now with the same noise that I have recorded and posted here. Since I started jogging and am up to 3 miles (go ME!) it has persisted and refused to go away. After a run, when I walk into the house (which is warmer than outside because Thomas keeps turning the air conditioning off) my lung spasms and I have terrible coughing fits. The cough is productive and I have even had sticky gunk come up while jogging.

Up to this point, by the time I have a dr’s appt. the symptoms have subsided and I am left bringing in an audio of the event or describing it. This time, I was still symptomatic. He could hear the rattle without a stethoscope. When he listened with the stethoscope he was actually startled. “You sound terrible. I think you have pneumonia on the right side. This is really loud.” Chest X-ray= normal. Spirometry=normal….108% (always shooting for that 100% LOL) I told him that maybe he needed lexapro for anxiety because clearly nothing was wrong with me.

He laughed and then said “No. This is most definitely not in my head or yours. You can not make up that kind of rattle.”

Off to CT on Friday…and left with a sad sinking feeling about the end of the physician/patient relationship with doctorfriend whom I have trusted for the last 8 years with every part of my healthcare.

Thursday I did more gardening…stepped on a rake…bonked myself in the head with the handle and then had a fender bender in my new van that I just got 2 weeks ago. Yes…I am driving a new…used VW van. It is a 2003 silver GLS with custom leather seats and DVD system. I love, love, love my new van. It is clean, the air conditioning works, and it is a VW like my old one. This was sort of a requirement for me. The VW Eurovan is not being made for the US market anymore. Thomas and I have argued a lot about what to get when my old VW (a 2001) was finished. Two weeks ago, the transmission started slipping. I did a car soup search and discovered a VW Eurovan with less than 100,000 miles on it here in the area at our VW dealer (who we have bought all of our vehicles from!). The car wasn’t even on the floor yet and they had just put the ad online.

We bought it without ever having looked at it. Basically, I walked in and talked with one of the people from the repairs department who also has 5 kids and has steered me towards and away from vans that have come in over the last year. He gave me the thumbs up on this one and took me to one of the salespeople. The van was getting a new muffler and was not available to see or test drive, so he showed me pictures online. I told him “I’ll take it. It’s mine. I’ll go ahead and lay down a deposit.” The salesman freaked out and went back to the guy from the repair department and told him that I was crazy. The salesman said “If Kris said she’ll take it, she’ll take it. You’re welcome and you owe me.” We paid for it 2 hours later and took it home!

Anyway, back to this week. After dropping the kids off on Friday morning for their last day of school, I headed over for a HRCT. It’s sort of a good news/bad news kind of a thing. The good news is that I have been validated. Something is not right. The bad news is that something is not right. I have new ground glass opacities on the right side. The radiologist also read new opacities on the left side too, but a mayo trained pulmonologist who looked at it said he didn’t see anything on the left. Who knows. I am not sure of what the consequence of all of this is. I assume I’ll eventually hear from my PCP after the long weekend.

Andrew, Aidan and Zoe are now finished with school. Next week, Amanda and Alex finish up … and we can celebrate the end of missing assignments and homework stress and enjoy the beginning of soccer, baseball, T-ball, softball season! Woohoo….let the craziness begin….or….continue! LOL

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